Learning to say no in 4 short lessons.
3 June 2013
Read by 1891 persons
Often, to avoid upsetting, hurting, or offending, you don't know how to say "no". Yet, you are against the idea, you can't provide that service immediately, you are also overwhelmed with work and files to close...
How to say no?
Ask yourself two important questions:
Your colleague arrives and asks for your help...? What to do, immediately, in the face of the request?
Ask yourself honestly:
- Do I want to accept or refuse (considering the different parameters Time, Required Skill, Framework of your activities...)?
- Does the person making this request have "power" over my activities? (Indeed, verify that the proposal is within the scope of your responsibilities)
Remember that refusing is not rejecting:
Don't confuse refusing to act on a request and rejecting the person in front of you. You are not cutting contact with your colleague because you didn't agree with them.
On the contrary, think about expressing your feelings verbally. It is not a question here of making excuses, which will undoubtedly put you in a situation of guilt, but rather of explaining in a few -polite- words what motivates your refusal: fear, lack of time, lack of skills in the field in question, lack of interest, size of the task... Keep your personal goals in mind and give yourself the right to focus on them, above all else.
Choose the words of your answer with accuracy and precision:
Use carefully chosen words. Thus, think about action verbs, verbs that express the activity you practice (example: "I prefer to work, act, do, finish...").
Remain, in all circumstances, positive and open.
Know how to emphasize what you want to do and remain light on what you don't want to do.
Allow yourself time for reflection:
Don't hesitate to take time to reflect. Big decisions are best not made too quickly. Allow yourself the right to balance: weigh the pros and cons and become aware of the real "risks" of saying "no". Why not give your interlocutor a partial answer right away: "Give me time to study the situation and I'll get back to you" or the classic "Yes, provided that..."?
The ReKrute.com Team
How to say no?
Ask yourself two important questions:
Your colleague arrives and asks for your help...? What to do, immediately, in the face of the request?
Ask yourself honestly:
- Do I want to accept or refuse (considering the different parameters Time, Required Skill, Framework of your activities...)?
- Does the person making this request have "power" over my activities? (Indeed, verify that the proposal is within the scope of your responsibilities)
Remember that refusing is not rejecting:
Don't confuse refusing to act on a request and rejecting the person in front of you. You are not cutting contact with your colleague because you didn't agree with them.
On the contrary, think about expressing your feelings verbally. It is not a question here of making excuses, which will undoubtedly put you in a situation of guilt, but rather of explaining in a few -polite- words what motivates your refusal: fear, lack of time, lack of skills in the field in question, lack of interest, size of the task... Keep your personal goals in mind and give yourself the right to focus on them, above all else.
Choose the words of your answer with accuracy and precision:
Use carefully chosen words. Thus, think about action verbs, verbs that express the activity you practice (example: "I prefer to work, act, do, finish...").
Remain, in all circumstances, positive and open.
Know how to emphasize what you want to do and remain light on what you don't want to do.
Allow yourself time for reflection:
Don't hesitate to take time to reflect. Big decisions are best not made too quickly. Allow yourself the right to balance: weigh the pros and cons and become aware of the real "risks" of saying "no". Why not give your interlocutor a partial answer right away: "Give me time to study the situation and I'll get back to you" or the classic "Yes, provided that..."?
The ReKrute.com Team
