Ten ingredients for successful daily interpersonal relationships
15 July 2012
Read by 1820 persons
Considering the time we spend at our desks (far less enjoyable, it must be admitted, than Georges Brassens' "lovers' park benches"), it is imperative to find satisfactions there that go beyond the purely professional. Human relationships seem to be important for everyone, as they undeniably contribute to personal fulfillment.
It is the responsibility of each person to be mindful of how they interact with others.
Here are five basic ingredients for successful teamwork.
Connecting with others
Developing communication skills means, above all, developing genuine interest in others. Real interest. It's about going beyond the automatic, conditioned, and formatted "How are you? Fine, fine," while continuing to walk down the hall. It's about looking at the other person, truly seeing them. Giving them their space, their right to exist as a complete individual, not just their professional and utilitarian representation. To connect is to have the will to truly be interested in what the other person is experiencing.
Learn to say hello to your colleagues every morning in a genuine, simple, and honest way. You will see that your relationships will become richer and more fulfilling.
Knowing how to listen and hear
Listening to others? It's possible. Simply start by letting them truly express themselves, learning to avoid the most common pitfalls: judging, advising, offering solutions, reassuring at all costs, comparing and relating to oneself, abruptly interrupting, acting like a self-righteous expert, etc. Listening requires concentration, a certain depth of thought, and the desire to let the other person speak in their own way.
However, be careful to avoid the main pitfall of listening too well: taking on the role of your colleague's therapist.
Developing your capacity for empathy
What is empathy? It is the ability to feel the emotions of others, to fully share them with them. It's being "on the same wavelength, on the same frequency" as the person in front of you. This requires a "natural decoder" of emotions, a spontaneous mastery of the tools for developing our relational and emotional intelligence.
However, here again, the risk is to become overwhelmed by emotions that are not our own and not knowing how to disentangle oneself.
Avoiding judgment
Judging is often what we do right before condemning. A golden rule, not to be overlooked, would therefore be never to attack the person and their unique personality. The greatest therapists say: "The feeling of being judged causes either flight or, conversely, a drive to fight, but in no case does it improve human relationships."
Behind every judgment is a hidden emotion that we cannot express... Try to connect with your own emotion and make sure to address the other person without judging them from your high horse.
Maintaining a sense of humor
Adapting your humor to your interlocutor is, without a doubt, the basic rule of tactful humor, that is, humor that doesn't hurt. Derision, mockery, cynicism, sarcasm can be very badly received by someone who is doubtful, fragile, or extremely sensitive. Teasing can be hurtful and can sometimes even turn into a sophisticated form of moral harassment.
Cooperating with kindness, remaining human and approachable, should not be too complex with a view to developing everyone's well-being.
Article written by The ReKrute.com team
Posted on July 15, 2012.
It is the responsibility of each person to be mindful of how they interact with others.
Here are five basic ingredients for successful teamwork.
Connecting with others
Developing communication skills means, above all, developing genuine interest in others. Real interest. It's about going beyond the automatic, conditioned, and formatted "How are you? Fine, fine," while continuing to walk down the hall. It's about looking at the other person, truly seeing them. Giving them their space, their right to exist as a complete individual, not just their professional and utilitarian representation. To connect is to have the will to truly be interested in what the other person is experiencing.
Learn to say hello to your colleagues every morning in a genuine, simple, and honest way. You will see that your relationships will become richer and more fulfilling.
Knowing how to listen and hear
Listening to others? It's possible. Simply start by letting them truly express themselves, learning to avoid the most common pitfalls: judging, advising, offering solutions, reassuring at all costs, comparing and relating to oneself, abruptly interrupting, acting like a self-righteous expert, etc. Listening requires concentration, a certain depth of thought, and the desire to let the other person speak in their own way.
However, be careful to avoid the main pitfall of listening too well: taking on the role of your colleague's therapist.
Developing your capacity for empathy
What is empathy? It is the ability to feel the emotions of others, to fully share them with them. It's being "on the same wavelength, on the same frequency" as the person in front of you. This requires a "natural decoder" of emotions, a spontaneous mastery of the tools for developing our relational and emotional intelligence.
However, here again, the risk is to become overwhelmed by emotions that are not our own and not knowing how to disentangle oneself.
Avoiding judgment
Judging is often what we do right before condemning. A golden rule, not to be overlooked, would therefore be never to attack the person and their unique personality. The greatest therapists say: "The feeling of being judged causes either flight or, conversely, a drive to fight, but in no case does it improve human relationships."
Behind every judgment is a hidden emotion that we cannot express... Try to connect with your own emotion and make sure to address the other person without judging them from your high horse.
Maintaining a sense of humor
Adapting your humor to your interlocutor is, without a doubt, the basic rule of tactful humor, that is, humor that doesn't hurt. Derision, mockery, cynicism, sarcasm can be very badly received by someone who is doubtful, fragile, or extremely sensitive. Teasing can be hurtful and can sometimes even turn into a sophisticated form of moral harassment.
Cooperating with kindness, remaining human and approachable, should not be too complex with a view to developing everyone's well-being.
Article written by The ReKrute.com team
Posted on July 15, 2012.
