Maintaining Good Relations with Your Boss, Come What May
4 January 2013
Read by 1672 persons
Yes, he exists, that boss who is so obnoxious it's almost comical, that unpleasant and rude boss who spends his time making unkind remarks to everyone, who criticizes you in front of a client and humiliates his employees, without even realizing it, during general meetings.
Yes. He exists. Sometimes even more so than in the most farcical and exaggerated comedies.
Here are some tips to keep in mind to prevent the situation from worsening and to avoid having to leave your job – which you actually quite like, when the boss is physically far away from you.
Don't get involved in office gossip.
It's inevitable, in a company as in high school, there are groups or cliques or even just colleagues who are fighting, competing, in conflict. Above all, stay away! Don't get involved in the bickering, don't take sides. Remain neutral. Inevitably, getting involved adds to the disorder. Your boss, however unbearable he may be, will appreciate those in his team who stay away from the human fields of discord. And, no doubt, your non-intervention will allow others to trust you even more.
Avoid using "you," instead prefer "I."
The important thing is to avoid attack, direct confrontation, and therefore not to accuse the Other during the dialogue. Don't say to your boss: "You criticize my work." Say rather: "This is how I feel when my work is criticized without precision, without explanation." It is always better to start with yourself and express your feelings than to go onto the other's turf to make reproaches. Turn your anger against "YOU" into an attempt at communication with "I".
Cite facts, don't judge a personality.
Even if your boss regularly has the bad manners to criticize you in front of your client or colleagues, even if he doesn't respect the basics of courtesy, don't enter his game (or his "I") by telling him head-on that he is rude. Stick to the facts, the details of the event, the exact moment that was disturbing, shocking. Mention the phrases, specify what was said, but do not at any point point out his temperament, his nature, his personality. Stay outside the judgment and away from any personal and emotional ground. It's not about talking to him about his character but about a very precise fact. Not engaging in verbal attacks often avoids unnecessary clashes.
Let the delicate moment pass.
Get into the habit of not reacting in anger. Let it pass, subside. Wait until you regain your calm and composure before responding orally or in writing, to an email or letter. The best way not to say things you'll regret later is to wait until the pressure and tension have passed. Being credible professionally also means being able to take a step back from the situation and consider it from above, without being too "parasitized" by emotions.
Article written by The ReKrute.com Team
Yes. He exists. Sometimes even more so than in the most farcical and exaggerated comedies.
Here are some tips to keep in mind to prevent the situation from worsening and to avoid having to leave your job – which you actually quite like, when the boss is physically far away from you.
Don't get involved in office gossip.
It's inevitable, in a company as in high school, there are groups or cliques or even just colleagues who are fighting, competing, in conflict. Above all, stay away! Don't get involved in the bickering, don't take sides. Remain neutral. Inevitably, getting involved adds to the disorder. Your boss, however unbearable he may be, will appreciate those in his team who stay away from the human fields of discord. And, no doubt, your non-intervention will allow others to trust you even more.
Avoid using "you," instead prefer "I."
The important thing is to avoid attack, direct confrontation, and therefore not to accuse the Other during the dialogue. Don't say to your boss: "You criticize my work." Say rather: "This is how I feel when my work is criticized without precision, without explanation." It is always better to start with yourself and express your feelings than to go onto the other's turf to make reproaches. Turn your anger against "YOU" into an attempt at communication with "I".
Cite facts, don't judge a personality.
Even if your boss regularly has the bad manners to criticize you in front of your client or colleagues, even if he doesn't respect the basics of courtesy, don't enter his game (or his "I") by telling him head-on that he is rude. Stick to the facts, the details of the event, the exact moment that was disturbing, shocking. Mention the phrases, specify what was said, but do not at any point point out his temperament, his nature, his personality. Stay outside the judgment and away from any personal and emotional ground. It's not about talking to him about his character but about a very precise fact. Not engaging in verbal attacks often avoids unnecessary clashes.
Let the delicate moment pass.
Get into the habit of not reacting in anger. Let it pass, subside. Wait until you regain your calm and composure before responding orally or in writing, to an email or letter. The best way not to say things you'll regret later is to wait until the pressure and tension have passed. Being credible professionally also means being able to take a step back from the situation and consider it from above, without being too "parasitized" by emotions.
Article written by The ReKrute.com Team
