To be credible in all circumstances, find the right words
24 May 2011
Read by 2019 persons
The ability to use the right phrasing and tone is a major professional asset. Here's how to get your messages across tactfully.
"Me, me, me. For an hour, he only talked about himself and his accomplishments!" fumes Sandrine, a saleswoman in a cosmetics company. During her first meeting with her new supervisor, he made a terrible impression on her. Intimidated by this more experienced colleague, he tried to impress her, appearing to her as a know-it-all. Yet, he is a good professional, but he went about it the wrong way. The choice of words, the way of asking questions and expressing one's point of view influence the image one gives of oneself. Finding the right words in all circumstances will help you get your ideas across and earn the respect of your colleagues.
Learn to make a good first impression
When you meet someone for the first time, personalize your "hello" by following it with your interlocutor's name or first name. It's less generic, more respectful, and you'll have a better chance of getting their attention. Then, whether it's a job interview, a client meeting, or less formal circumstances like a cocktail party, state your identity clearly and concisely. Once introductions are made, you can break the ice, with a thank you for example. When facing a prospect, use a phrase like: "I appreciate you taking the time to meet me." During the discussion, show interest in the other person: "And yourself, what is your background?"
Furthermore, some people believe that using jargon will make them look like pros: this is false. Even if your interlocutor knows your sector of activity, avoid acronyms and technical terms. Also, do not use pompous or outdated expressions: concluding with a "Pleased to have met you" or "Looking forward to seeing you again" is corny. Prefer: "I was delighted to meet you. If you allow me, I will contact you again in a week." Ending the interview by anticipating the next step underlines the interest you have in the other person.
Rephrase statements to avoid misunderstandings
In meetings or one-on-one, this technique ensures that you have been understood or that you have correctly interpreted what has been said. Whether your interlocutor corrects the situation or confirms your statements, the exchange will be smoother. You can then move on to the next step. With the steps validated one after the other, the meeting progresses faster. Finally, take care of the conclusion. It must be clear, precise, almost directive: "Eric, you are in charge of benchmarking the competition. Elise, you analyze our strengths and weaknesses. We will meet again in a week to review the situation."
Gain support during a negotiation
An accepted idea is a shared idea. This is why the best way to convince an interlocutor is to associate them with your reasoning. This applies to the client you want to win over, as well as to the boss from whom you are asking for a budget increase. In the case of a salary negotiation, start by stating the facts: "On three occasions, I have secured essential contracts. No later than yesterday, I was able to..." Giving figures and dates makes your speech concrete. Then, rely on your interlocutor's words: "You yourself admitted to being satisfied with my results..." The objective: to be clear in your request, determined and fair in tone. To do this, use language close to theirs, or even some of their expressions! You will give them the impression of being on the same wavelength and you will more easily gain their support. Is your idea criticized? Avoid confrontation: "You are right. However, in view of the current results..." Whereas a "But no..." risks upsetting your interlocutor.
Assert yourself gently in difficult situations
Reprimanding a colleague, making a reproach to your superior, responding to personal attacks... so many delicate situations for which you must show both firmness and tact. If you have to reframe a colleague or assert your authority, you will paradoxically have more impact with nuance. Instead of attacking head-on with "You're wrong" or "Your work disappointed me", prefer "I was disappointed with the quality of this file". Another tip to avoid accusation: use "we" - "I think we can do better" - which softens the personal dimension of a remark and gets the message across without attacking your interlocutor. Or, temper it with a positive point: "Your work is excellent. It's a shame that your behavior spoils it." You thus prove that you are not rejecting the person but their attitude.
Published on May 23, 2011
Posted online on May 24, 2011
Capital.fr
"Me, me, me. For an hour, he only talked about himself and his accomplishments!" fumes Sandrine, a saleswoman in a cosmetics company. During her first meeting with her new supervisor, he made a terrible impression on her. Intimidated by this more experienced colleague, he tried to impress her, appearing to her as a know-it-all. Yet, he is a good professional, but he went about it the wrong way. The choice of words, the way of asking questions and expressing one's point of view influence the image one gives of oneself. Finding the right words in all circumstances will help you get your ideas across and earn the respect of your colleagues.
Learn to make a good first impression
When you meet someone for the first time, personalize your "hello" by following it with your interlocutor's name or first name. It's less generic, more respectful, and you'll have a better chance of getting their attention. Then, whether it's a job interview, a client meeting, or less formal circumstances like a cocktail party, state your identity clearly and concisely. Once introductions are made, you can break the ice, with a thank you for example. When facing a prospect, use a phrase like: "I appreciate you taking the time to meet me." During the discussion, show interest in the other person: "And yourself, what is your background?"
Furthermore, some people believe that using jargon will make them look like pros: this is false. Even if your interlocutor knows your sector of activity, avoid acronyms and technical terms. Also, do not use pompous or outdated expressions: concluding with a "Pleased to have met you" or "Looking forward to seeing you again" is corny. Prefer: "I was delighted to meet you. If you allow me, I will contact you again in a week." Ending the interview by anticipating the next step underlines the interest you have in the other person.
Rephrase statements to avoid misunderstandings
In meetings or one-on-one, this technique ensures that you have been understood or that you have correctly interpreted what has been said. Whether your interlocutor corrects the situation or confirms your statements, the exchange will be smoother. You can then move on to the next step. With the steps validated one after the other, the meeting progresses faster. Finally, take care of the conclusion. It must be clear, precise, almost directive: "Eric, you are in charge of benchmarking the competition. Elise, you analyze our strengths and weaknesses. We will meet again in a week to review the situation."
Gain support during a negotiation
An accepted idea is a shared idea. This is why the best way to convince an interlocutor is to associate them with your reasoning. This applies to the client you want to win over, as well as to the boss from whom you are asking for a budget increase. In the case of a salary negotiation, start by stating the facts: "On three occasions, I have secured essential contracts. No later than yesterday, I was able to..." Giving figures and dates makes your speech concrete. Then, rely on your interlocutor's words: "You yourself admitted to being satisfied with my results..." The objective: to be clear in your request, determined and fair in tone. To do this, use language close to theirs, or even some of their expressions! You will give them the impression of being on the same wavelength and you will more easily gain their support. Is your idea criticized? Avoid confrontation: "You are right. However, in view of the current results..." Whereas a "But no..." risks upsetting your interlocutor.
Assert yourself gently in difficult situations
Reprimanding a colleague, making a reproach to your superior, responding to personal attacks... so many delicate situations for which you must show both firmness and tact. If you have to reframe a colleague or assert your authority, you will paradoxically have more impact with nuance. Instead of attacking head-on with "You're wrong" or "Your work disappointed me", prefer "I was disappointed with the quality of this file". Another tip to avoid accusation: use "we" - "I think we can do better" - which softens the personal dimension of a remark and gets the message across without attacking your interlocutor. Or, temper it with a positive point: "Your work is excellent. It's a shame that your behavior spoils it." You thus prove that you are not rejecting the person but their attitude.
Published on May 23, 2011
Posted online on May 24, 2011
Capital.fr
