Learn to be silent
18 January 2014
Read by 2360 persons
Often seen as uncomfortable stillness, silence is nonetheless a formidable weapon for those who know how to use it wisely. As the saying goes, speech is silver, silence is gold, so why are we so afraid of it? Why does it make us so uncomfortable, especially when we are in front of an audience?
It's true, and I'm the first to admit it, learning to be silent is not easy, but when we know how many benefits there are, it may be time to make an effort and learn to listen... before speaking... Knowing how to be silent is above all... Showing genuine listening, demonstrating the consideration you give to your interlocutor. By taking the time to listen, we allow our interlocutor to complete their thoughts without interrupting, thinking we understand what they mean before they have finished saying it... We also give them the opportunity to delve deeper into their subject and say a little more than they initially planned to say. This allows them to begin to develop awareness, essential for any change! Also, silence is an excellent way, in many cases, to defuse conflict... Replace the "calm down!" that will only increase frustration and anger, with simple silence and you will see the surprising effect it will have on people... But also... Silence is a way to strengthen our position, to give weight to a question or remark. It can also be a formidable way to avoid saying anything foolish in the heat of the moment or thinking we have understood our interlocutor by offering a ready-made solution. In a face-to-face exchange, silence can be an important generator of trust. It makes our words credible and shows that we master our subject. A silence, before speaking, always gives impact to what follows... Managers, be aware, this communication style is much richer and more relevant than wanting at all costs to impose your point of view on your collaborators, no matter what. Listening and allowing free rein to proposals encourage dialogue where everyone will express themselves in a non-conflictual way to enrich what has just been said rather than fighting to defend an opposing point of view. However, beware, silence misused can, conversely, definitely harm you! It's not about letting silence settle and looking away... It is essential to maintain connection with your interlocutor and adapt all your para-verbal communication to the different emotions you wish to create and convey to your interlocutor at that precise moment. Paola Tumbarello Directrice ExeKutive.biz
It's true, and I'm the first to admit it, learning to be silent is not easy, but when we know how many benefits there are, it may be time to make an effort and learn to listen... before speaking... Knowing how to be silent is above all... Showing genuine listening, demonstrating the consideration you give to your interlocutor. By taking the time to listen, we allow our interlocutor to complete their thoughts without interrupting, thinking we understand what they mean before they have finished saying it... We also give them the opportunity to delve deeper into their subject and say a little more than they initially planned to say. This allows them to begin to develop awareness, essential for any change! Also, silence is an excellent way, in many cases, to defuse conflict... Replace the "calm down!" that will only increase frustration and anger, with simple silence and you will see the surprising effect it will have on people... But also... Silence is a way to strengthen our position, to give weight to a question or remark. It can also be a formidable way to avoid saying anything foolish in the heat of the moment or thinking we have understood our interlocutor by offering a ready-made solution. In a face-to-face exchange, silence can be an important generator of trust. It makes our words credible and shows that we master our subject. A silence, before speaking, always gives impact to what follows... Managers, be aware, this communication style is much richer and more relevant than wanting at all costs to impose your point of view on your collaborators, no matter what. Listening and allowing free rein to proposals encourage dialogue where everyone will express themselves in a non-conflictual way to enrich what has just been said rather than fighting to defend an opposing point of view. However, beware, silence misused can, conversely, definitely harm you! It's not about letting silence settle and looking away... It is essential to maintain connection with your interlocutor and adapt all your para-verbal communication to the different emotions you wish to create and convey to your interlocutor at that precise moment. Paola Tumbarello Directrice ExeKutive.biz
