Why is firing someone so painful?
28 June 2012
Read by 2032 persons
Point of view – Rémi Tremblay
Rémi Tremblay was president of Adecco Quebec and Adecco Canada. He is the author of three books: "Discover happiness at work", "The king's fools" and "I lost my watch at the bottom of the lake". Since 2004, he has been supporting leaders who wish to push the boundaries of their leadership. Recently, one of my clients left me a heartbreaking message:
"I need to talk to you. I'm in shock! I've been let go, just like that. I didn't see it coming."
What a way to "thank" someone who has given their energy, passion and talent to the organization for six years. Maybe this vice-president wasn't up to expectations. Maybe his vision no longer matched that of the company. But this manager gave everything he could. No one gets up in the morning hoping to harm their company all day!
As bosses, we have a great deal of responsibility. We chose this person. In the case of the vice-president mentioned above, we even promoted him. It is perhaps guilt that leads us to be so clumsy when saying goodbye. Did we take the time to talk with this employee about the vision and spirit of the company and the work to be done?
It is unacceptable for a dismissal to be a surprise. What violence! Not to mention the fear it causes those who remain. A dismissal should result from an open dialogue about the discomfort felt by both parties, leading to the conclusion that separation is the best solution. The transition becomes less painful for everyone. Because a job loss, like any loss, is a bereavement. As a leader, we have a responsibility to facilitate this transition.
Those who accompany the dying in their last moments teach us three things: limit suffering, allow the person to "close their loops" and help them find meaning in this passage. My client's boss, the vice-president, increased the suffering. The dismissal began with: "I'm sorry, but we don't have the same vision." It continued with highlighting the vice-president's incompetence. And it ended with the handing over of the keys and the escort to the exit, like a thief. As for closing the loops and giving meaning, we'll pass!
For me, incompetence does not exist. It's always that a person is not in the right position or in the right company. As a boss, we have a share of responsibility. We chose this person.
Laying someone off is one of the most difficult tasks for a manager. Probably because of the way it's done. For me, it's not so difficult anymore. It has even become a beautiful moment, because it follows a long reflection. It never comes as a surprise anymore and, most often, the person has found another job before leaving. The departure becomes a relief for everyone and we come out stronger from the journey we have taken together.
The same reasoning applies to layoffs, especially those with economic causes. We should have taken the time to examine the situation together and taken advantage of this moment to tell those who have been let go how important they have been and what talents we recognize in them, in order to help them in choosing their next job. This requires that we have the courage to slow down and take the necessary time. But it also requires love and compassion.
The most difficult thing is to have a transparent dialogue as soon as discomfort sets in. Accepting my share of responsibility in the other person's difficulties.
This vice-president I mentioned earlier had himself participated in the dismissal of another vice-president three months earlier, adopting the same type of treatment. At the time, he had justified everything by saying that the vice-president should have realized that things weren't going well.
Do you lay people off the way you would like to be laid off?
Rémi Tremblay.
Le-manager-urbain.com
Posted online June 28, 2012.
Rémi Tremblay was president of Adecco Quebec and Adecco Canada. He is the author of three books: "Discover happiness at work", "The king's fools" and "I lost my watch at the bottom of the lake". Since 2004, he has been supporting leaders who wish to push the boundaries of their leadership. Recently, one of my clients left me a heartbreaking message:
"I need to talk to you. I'm in shock! I've been let go, just like that. I didn't see it coming."
What a way to "thank" someone who has given their energy, passion and talent to the organization for six years. Maybe this vice-president wasn't up to expectations. Maybe his vision no longer matched that of the company. But this manager gave everything he could. No one gets up in the morning hoping to harm their company all day!
As bosses, we have a great deal of responsibility. We chose this person. In the case of the vice-president mentioned above, we even promoted him. It is perhaps guilt that leads us to be so clumsy when saying goodbye. Did we take the time to talk with this employee about the vision and spirit of the company and the work to be done?
It is unacceptable for a dismissal to be a surprise. What violence! Not to mention the fear it causes those who remain. A dismissal should result from an open dialogue about the discomfort felt by both parties, leading to the conclusion that separation is the best solution. The transition becomes less painful for everyone. Because a job loss, like any loss, is a bereavement. As a leader, we have a responsibility to facilitate this transition.
Those who accompany the dying in their last moments teach us three things: limit suffering, allow the person to "close their loops" and help them find meaning in this passage. My client's boss, the vice-president, increased the suffering. The dismissal began with: "I'm sorry, but we don't have the same vision." It continued with highlighting the vice-president's incompetence. And it ended with the handing over of the keys and the escort to the exit, like a thief. As for closing the loops and giving meaning, we'll pass!
For me, incompetence does not exist. It's always that a person is not in the right position or in the right company. As a boss, we have a share of responsibility. We chose this person.
Laying someone off is one of the most difficult tasks for a manager. Probably because of the way it's done. For me, it's not so difficult anymore. It has even become a beautiful moment, because it follows a long reflection. It never comes as a surprise anymore and, most often, the person has found another job before leaving. The departure becomes a relief for everyone and we come out stronger from the journey we have taken together.
The same reasoning applies to layoffs, especially those with economic causes. We should have taken the time to examine the situation together and taken advantage of this moment to tell those who have been let go how important they have been and what talents we recognize in them, in order to help them in choosing their next job. This requires that we have the courage to slow down and take the necessary time. But it also requires love and compassion.
The most difficult thing is to have a transparent dialogue as soon as discomfort sets in. Accepting my share of responsibility in the other person's difficulties.
This vice-president I mentioned earlier had himself participated in the dismissal of another vice-president three months earlier, adopting the same type of treatment. At the time, he had justified everything by saying that the vice-president should have realized that things weren't going well.
Do you lay people off the way you would like to be laid off?
Rémi Tremblay.
Le-manager-urbain.com
Posted online June 28, 2012.
